Posts

Creating a New Normal

I've had this conversation a few times in the last few weeks and felt like it made a good broader discussion. It came up because last month I rejoined Instagram and of course, friends soon started recommending the funny meme pages that I needed to follow.

I won't lie, some of them are pretty funny. But what I realized very quickly is how all of this tries to normalize self destructive behaviors such procrastination, excessive over eating, binge drinking, being late, poor sleep habits, etc.

I saw it mirrored in the behaviors of some people I care about, a friend of mine joking that that he is overweight and yet persists in overeating. A joke as if it is funny that obesity as we age is funny - when he has a family depending on him. Followed up with a funny meme or two, he thinks he has normalized a situation that deep down depresses him.

However, aside from the funny meme pages, I also started following a few highly successful entrepreneurs and a dozen or so incredibly fit indiv…

Review: Downton Abbey Movie (no spoilers)

About a month ago I excitedly pre-ordered my tickets to see the Downton Abbey movie, and last week was the big day. The theater was completely full, which stood out because I cannot remember the last time that theater was totally sold out.
There were women there dressed up with fascinators in their hair, and other women clearly having a girls' night in large groups. My husband and sister went with me, and my husband was one of maybe 5 men in the theater, which always surprises me because the men I know love the show!
I went into the movie with hesitation because the series was so well done that you always worry they will jump the shark, so to speak, in an effort to milk a good thing. However, I also didn't go in cynically, so I was hesitant but hopeful that the movie would be a delight.
Whereas the TV series is like the long unwinding of a great epic novel, where the subplots slowly twist together and you learn about the characters over long periods of time, the movie was more…

Celebrating my Anniversary - 13 Years of Marriage

In the next week, my husband and I will celebrate thirteen years of marriage. I don't feel like it's been an especially long time, but it hasn't been short either. When I think about us both at age twenty-three on our wedding day, and now, I realize that together we have achieved a lot, and overcome a lot, and we have built a household that thrives on laughter and uncontrived happiness.

We've been married thirteen years, but he'd known me for almost 7 years before he contracted himself to me by law (I was 16 when he met me). He knew what he was getting into on our wedding day. The day we got married, I was literally an illegal immigrant in this country, unable to work and no longer eligible for school. As if that already doesn't sound like a great bet to take, he knew everything else too - that I can be an exhibitionist, that I am mischievous as hell, crass, a bad cook and a worse driver. He knew my neatness bordered on pathological, that I was both rebellious …

My Objection to Closing the Door on Healthy Debate

I have been troubled lately by friends and acquaintances who refuse to discuss politics with me - perhaps because I am a "crazy" third party voter, or perhaps because I come to every discussion perfectly equipped with sources and facts - and they yet share things on social media that I find borderline offensive in some ways. But they don't want me to broach the subjects with them, as they believe it will harm our friendship. But somehow they think it will not harm the friendship to post these openly and yet close the door on healthy debate.

I am indeed a "foolish third party voter" - I do indeed "waste" my vote by believing in change, a different track and breaking free of a two party system where I believe the two parties aren't truly that different from one another. However, once long ago, I was a conservative that supported the Republican party, because I believed that party was most aligned with the values of freedom and personal responsibilit…

Myers Briggs Type Indicator - Communicating Better

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At some point during my time in university, as part of my leadership courses, we were asked to take the Myers Briggs (MBTI) test, which asks some questions to determine a little about your personality type, how you communicate, and how you see the world.

This is not a test meant to put people into boxes. It is meant to shed a some light on how we might better communicate with one another after understanding them and ourselves a little better. It's not a road map to our lives; it's a mirror to ourselves and a window to others, allowing for better understanding between people.

There are a few places to take this test online, the official MBTI test is here, which is what I took while in school, or also this one that is a little more engaging and fun!  What you'll surmise quickly is that there are 16 different types and it comes down to four letters.  My type: ISTP (introverted-sensing-thinking-perceiving).


This image helps a bit understanding the different components of how t…

I Was Nearly Killed by a Drunk Driver

It's pretty much common sense to agree people shouldn't drink and drive. Yet, people do and if you pull up your county bookings online (public record) you can find people are getting charged with this everyday.

My family has been wrought with the pain and consequences of this. My mom has buried more than one family member due to someone else on the road driving while intoxicated. And last week, it could have been me she had to bury.
It was Friday evening, it was around 8:30pm and the sun was inching closer to the horizon. I was listening to my music while out for my workout. I was on my normal circuit for five miles, enjoying the evening.
Unexpectedly, a driver coming toward me ran off the road, popped his tire and didn't stop, hit the curb again, popped another tire, and slammed full blast into a light pole, taking the light pole down. The only thing that prevented the pole from crashing into the roof of his vehicle was it got snagged on a power line, which was now dangli…

Gaining Confidence with Age

The past few weeks I have been engaged in some training initiatives for my new role at work. This training has involved a lot of new material and experiences and has required me to interact with tons of people I don't know and from business segments to which I am still pretty unfamiliar. When I got home from work last night, after a long week or learning, interacting and so much socialization, I told my sister that it is hard to imagine myself ten or fifteen years ago having the confidence to do this.
It led into an interesting discussion about confidence increasing with years. I have always been a confident person, even when I have been the underdog, even when I have been openly disparaged for my beliefs or opinions (I think back to a project in my high school economics class were I proposed privatization of health care and education - I was ridiculed). However, I have always been very comfortable in these situations and therefore I was confident.
And that led me to the realizati…