Let Him Speak!

It is a regrettable thing that so many women resist allowing their husbands to express their true opinions.  How I hate to see someone sit in silence when I know they have something valuable to say!

If my husband truly cherishes me as a person, I would have to assume that his opinions and advice about me, my life, our home and the future are all with my best interest in mind.  This is not to say that I will always agree, but how would I know if he never shares his thoughts with me?  So often we see men hesitate to share their opinions with their wives because too many times a curt response has shattered their confidence.  They bite their lip and deprive their wives of their opinion.

I was raised in a household of opinionated people, all expressing themselves, and whether in argument or agreement, we felt quite free to do so.  My parents were open with one another about their opinions, and sometimes there was disagreement, but without disagreement, we would never need to compromise.  So, it is no surprise that I married a man who is not shy about sharing his opinions with me.

I love nothing more than knowing my husband is thinking about me.  And if his thoughts about me linger long enough to drum up a theory of advice for me, I am touched.  If my husband sees me struggling against a project or task or even my emotions, I am honored that he would step in with an idea of how to help.  And to be honest, when I head for the door to go out in my worst outfit, I am glad he has the courage to ask me if I am sure about it. 

We women never seem to shrink from expressing our opinions, and we should welcome men to do it as well.  It shouldn’t be in judgment, but rather out of love.  Sometimes honesty is uncomfortable, but that is where we grow closer to one another.  Some of the best decisions I have ever made have been with the confidence of knowing that I had the advice or support of my husband. 

We get tricked into thinking that by silencing the opposition that we have gained power, but all we have really done is put the best advisors we have on mute.  Why struggle through life alone when two heads are better than one?  And there will certainly be disagreement, but conflict does not have to be a negative thing.  Conflict can teach us to listen to others, respect differences, hear new ideas, communicate more effectively and demonstrate and practice emotional regulation.  A lack of conflict is not necessarily a sign of happy times.

We should trust enough in the love that our husbands bear us to welcome their feedback!